Relationship Reflection

I would like to focus this blog submission upon relationships.  There are many different types of relationships and they all have a different impact on a person.  They also require different things to keep them active and healthy.  One relationship might mean more to a person than another; however, that doesn’t mean that they are not both meaningful and important to the person.

Relationships are important to me because I need interaction with people.  I do not have a lot of friends but I have an immediate family, a boyfriend, a close friend, and my church family.  Each one of these relationships has certain requirements, likes and dislikes, and moments of joy. I would like to explain what is important about my relationship with my immediate family.

 

My relationship with my immediate family is a good one.  We spend family times together for holidays and special events.  We text or call each other often just to keep in contact.  Often times we attend church events together or just go out to dinner and a movie.  We tend to congregate when there is a member that is sick or has another need that requires our assistance.

This is my mom, me and my dad, my sister Simone, and my sister Jocelyn.

      

       

I have four children and five grandchildren.  Pictured are my daughter Serena, my son Rakeem, my second oldest, Jerrell, and my grandaughter Juliesha.  I refer to my granddaughter a lot in my writings for my courses.  She is the only one that lives in the same household as I do.  

      
         

My other grandkids live in the same city but I rarely have contact with them due to relationship issues with my sons and the children’s moms.  This conflict hurts our relationship because they don’t know me as they should especially since we live so close to each other. I have not made any extra efforts to encourage the relationships because I don’t want to push myself on the mothers.  In relation to child care, its important to respect the parent’s wishes even when you disagree with their choice.  Your position as educator, director, or in my case grandparent; does not give you the authority over the parent’s.  Sometimes parents will not agree with your suggested plan of action.  Professionalism will allow you to respect the parents wishes and give them the opportunity to decide what is best for their child in their eyes. 

 However, the following pictures are of Xavier Jr., Zay’moni, Anguliah (their mom) and Amiyah. 

               

           

 

My relationship with my boyfriend Tony is a strong one although we have our disagreements.  I have learned several things about myself and how I perceive things thoughout our relationship that has hindered our closeness.  I have learned to examine my actions and see if I reacted correctly when I get upset.  There have been several times that I reacted wrongly because I didn’t communicate.  So my actions was based on my feelings instead of the facts.  This lesson will help me out as an educator because I now think about the situation at hand before I react.  When I am in leadership and administration, I will be faced with several situations that can go bad very quickly if there is not a person in the mix with a level head.  If you don’t act on your emotions but respond on the facts it can alliveate a lot of wrong actions.  Another aspect of our relationship is that our personalities clash at times.  We have learned to accept the other person for who they are and not try to change them.  This simple action has helped us appreciate the other more.  In terms of parental relationships with educators, there will be times that your personality will clash with a parent or family member.  However, you must remain focused on what the common goal is-educating the child.  Educators must learn to accept the parent or family member and seek to accept that person as they are.  They might be loud and boisterous or tend to react in a negative way before they hear you out.  The goal in this case is to learn different ways to communicate with the parents in a way that will not cause them to be easily irritated.  Although this is not always an easy task.

I have a close friend named Bobbie that I have known for 16 years.  We met in church and have been best friends to the point that our children respect the other person as an aunt.  We have lost contact for years at a time but have always picked up where we left off-laughing and enjoying each other.  This relationship shows that you don’t have to be around a person all of the time in order to have a good relationship with them.  Its important to give a person their space and not want to houver over them and expect them to be in your front door all of the times.  I relate this relationship to parents that might not want to be included in all phrases of partnership that you have offered in your center.  They might not want to be involved in any thing; so its important not to push the parents.  Their reasons might be various for not being involved but its important to give them their space and not pressure them.  

My final relationship is one with my church family.  I attend services and am very cordial when I am around them.  However, I do not associate with anyone outside of church times and I am not a member of any special groups or activities.  I give my all when I am asked to do things but besides that I am not involved.  Many parents will be the same way in educational programs.  They might seem standoffish and not willing to get involved.  However, they will participate if asked.  As educators, we have to make attempts to include all parents-even the ones that appear not to want to be involved.  They might be shy or don’t recognize that they have skills that can contribute to what the center needs.  Educators can assume but must act to include all parents and family members-just ask for the help.